Thursday, October 23, 2008

Journey into the unknown...

I recently escaped from one of the most damaging experiences of my life.  You know, the kind that makes you all "woe is me" and "why me" and a plethora of other pitiful and embarrassing emotions?  Well, this one really did a number on me.  I spent the better part of a month recovering from the trauma this "experience" inflicted on my psyche.  2 days after the great escape I was standing at my kitchen sink washing dishes, Fox news blaring in the background, husband arguing with the talking heads on television and my two kids wrestling on the floor and it's like a switch flipped on, and I could see again.  I stopped what I was doing, and said, "Scot, I'm home."  I had been present but absent for almost 3 months, and the weight of that realization really hurt. 

So, unwilling to let a poor (ok, poor is a really tame word.  But it's a PG rated blog. So there.) choice keep me down after it knocked me down, I started really looking for the lemonade.  I sure had a lot of lemons, so it just made sense.  I realized that maybe what I was doing wasn't what I was supposed to be doing, and God was setting me on a new path.  

Long story a little shorter, signs have been coming at me hard and fast.  The latest of which was just last night, when I found out I would not be returning to the NPO world right now, as I thought I might.  I've spent the better part of a decade raising money for very worthy causes...and I was pretty happy.  I was good at it.  It made sense and filled a need within me to do something that mattered.  But I can't help but see now that I have neglected my own creative soul in the process.  Surely, there is a way to do both.  So, I'm beginning the journey now. And it's exciting as can be.

No comments:

Post a Comment