About 13 years ago, I was an avid runner. I ran 3 miles every morning and three miles every evening. I was in the best cardiovascular shape of my life. Emotional and mental shape was pretty iffy, but I had a buff bod.
Fast forward a decade. I had two babies in the span of less than two years...that's two pregnancies, two deliveries, and two babies nursing for going on 4 years now, nonstop....well, my body is now torturing me back. I feel heavy, lumpy and definitely too mommy-ish for my brain, which is still stuck somewhere back 10 years ago when I was a hot babe. Let me tell ya, it sucks to be a hot babe in your head and a soccer mom below the neck.
Thanks to the motivation of an upcoming 5K for an excellent cause, and the support of my goody goody gumdrop friends, I am pounding the pavement again, and loving it. I'm up to running about 20 minutes at a stretch now, in just 3 and a half weeks. I think my body remembered. My mind sure does. I am loving the feeling of peace you get when your mind just blanks out and you are thinking of nothing but the rhythm of your feet and your breathing. It's pretty zen.
The first week, I felt really HEAVY. Like someone was holding onto my heiney while I ran. I didn't have to turn around and look to figure out that the only thing clinging to my ass was my ass itself. *sigh* Baby steps, right?
So, hopefully by the time I fly to Buffalo to race in September, I will be closer to physically embracing my inner babe. But more than just getting my body back, I feel like I am reclaiming a part of me that has been shelved for a few years. The selfish part of me. The part that says, "It's ok to take an hour for yourself to workout and eat some of the expensive strawberries."
It's easy to be selfless when you are a mom. It doesn't even seem like a sacrifice to sacrifice. But it sure does feel nice to take yourself off of the back burner for just a little while each day. I'm a better mom for it, I think.